Drought.

Wow.  What a week.  I'm not sure where to start.  I'll begin here: For the past several weeks or possibly even couple of months, I have been going through a drought.  I am dry and have not been seeking God.  I have been going through a spiritual drought.  I haven't been on any sort of radical path of destruction, but I have been merely living.  Getting by day to day, with no interaction with God.  Lately, since school has started back, I feel overwhelmed, like I have no time for anything.  Last Sunday, I talked with one of my good friends, Joy Petty, and we decided to get together on Tuesday for coffee and to talk about life and to get advice from things that have come up in my blog.  From Sunday through Tuesday, I began to pray to God that He would speak to me and help me with work and to speak to me through Joy.  (I don't see how you could teach prek and not be a Christian.  It is HARD.) I also began to pray that God would give me direction into how to go about spending time with Him throughout the week.  I never feel like I have the time.  I decided that I would get up early before school Monday morning and take some time to pray.

Monday morning alarm came.  I hit the snooze.  I had missed it.  I thought my sleep was more important I guess.  So then I knew my day was jammed full.  I would not have time for prayer or Bible study today.  Then, after school that day, something happened that ONLY God could do.  My prek classroom, as I have told you, is packed full of stuff.  A lot of it I don't need.  So I decided to load up a bunch of the stuff in my car, drive to the back of the school, and see if the prek shed had any room in it (since my garage clearly doesn't.)  It had a little room in it, so I unloaded all the stuff and went to drive back around the school.  (One way road behind the school.)  As I started to come around the back of the building, I realized there was a forever long line of cars blocking the way out of the school.  Apparently chorus parents were there to pick up their kids.  Quickly, I decided to put it in reverse to see if I could find another way out.  Too late.  Cars were already lining up behind me.  I was stuck with a million things that I needed to get done.  Figuring I was gonna be there a while, I reached for my phone to call Adam and talk to him for a while.  I did not have my phone.  This has pretty much never happened before.  I left my phone in my classroom cause I  knew I would be coming right back.  I realized right away that this was an opportunity from God.  Even though I had neglected Him earlier, I was getting another chance.  I prayed right there in the car rider line.  I was so excited that I had received interaction from God.  It was amazing.  I hadn't spent time with Him in a long time.  I was so happy to know God hadn't forgotten me.

Then Tuesday night I met with Joy.  I enjoy talking to her so much.  I shared some of the things I've been going through lately.  She gave me a solution to all of it that I didn't see coming.  Get in the Word.  Read.  Daily.  Many times a day.  Ignore the messages of the world, and read what God says.  It sounds simple.  I wish it were.  Why is it so easy to try everything else but read God's word?  Sometimes I feel like I would rather read a "self help" book, look things up online, talk to other Christian girls, etc.  But why can't I just read the Bible?  It's great to do all those other things, but my first resource should be God and His Word.  I decided that was what I needed to do. 

So the next morning, I got up and read my Bible.  I started in the back of the Bible, looking up key words such as "Patience" (for my prek kids and daily life).  I looked up the verses and wrote some of them down.  I prayed that God would help me in this area.  I planned to continue to through the week getting up every morning and reading the Word.  I got sick, and my plan failed. 

What I needed (besides reading God's Word) was to have Him pierce my heart again.  My heart had become cold to Him and indifferent.  I wish I had known that was part of what I needed, because then I would have prayed for it.  But God knew anyway.  This morning in church a friend sang the song "Not Guilty."  That song pierced my heart like you wouldn't believe!!  It was just what God wanted me to hear.  It reminded me of WHY I should spend time with Him, what He has done for me, and the kindness, mercy, and PATIENCE He has shown me.  If you haven't heard this song, listen to it. 



I sat there in the pew crying.  That song is so powerful.  I needed to be reminded of those lyrics.  I couldn't wait to spend time privately worshipping and praying to God.  I'm so thankful to God for putting it on Melody's heart to sing that this morning.  It was amazing.  PRAISE GOD!  KING OF KINGS AND LORD OF LORDS!!!

We Love ALDI!!!!!

Today Adam and I went to Aldi.  Why have we not been to Aldi sooner??!?!!!  Oh my goodnes, we saved

 

soooo much money!!!  I have been trying to do couponing, but I honestly cannot keep up with the sales, remembering to buy the Sunday paper or get it from someone, etc.  I know there is couponmom.com but I didn't even have enough time to check that and plan my grocery list.  So I have heard a few people say that Aldi saves you money, but I really didn't think it would be that big a deal.  I mean, how much could it really save you?  Well, let me tell you.  Adam and I would spend $140 at Ingles on a "stock up" trip.  That's what we call it when we basically are down to nothing.  That price is using the Ingles Advantage Card.  But we went to Aldi today and did a stock up trip......keep reading for how much we paid :)

This is what we bought.  Now, it may not look like a ton.  But this is the stuff Adam and I eat on a regular basis.  We try to eat pretty healthily, and healthy food is EXPENSIVE!!!

This is Diet Dr. Dazzle (which I mistakingly keep calling Diet Dr. "Drizzle, lol), lean ground turkey meat, one pound of turkey lunch meat, salmon skewers (salmon with veggies on a skewer for grilling), turkey dogs, turkey bacon (did I mention we like turkey?), strawberries, bananas, whole grain chips, Bran Flakes cereal, Cinnamon Crunch cereal, Fit and Active (their healthy brand) pepperoni pizza calzones, Grilled Chicken Strips (already grilled, just have to heat them up), blueberries, 2 boxes of peanut butter chocoloate chip granola bars (only 100 calories per bar!), a dozen eggs, 6 yogurts, Fiesta dip made in their deli (black beans, salsa, sour cream, cheese, and guacamole..spell check....soo good!), Fit and Active whipped topping, a half gallon of green tea with honey, four cans of fruit, spaghetti sauce, and paper plates. 

LOTS of healthy stuff!  $140 at Ingles.....but at Aldi......$58!!!!!  Ohhhh yes!  I was so excited!  That Ingles trip did not even include some of the meat we got.  Meat is so expensive in the grocery store.  I couldn't believe the quality of the items we got for that price.  I mean, we didn't stock up on junk food.  Junk food is cheap.  This stuff is not.  Plus, this was a stock up trip!!  So we normally will probably only pay around $35-$40 or so.  I am so excited!!  We had a great time.  I took more pictures (to spread the excitement) but they're on my camera and not my cell phone.  My camera cord is MIA, so I need to get a new one.  YAY!  So excited!

Last night we had a date night and went to Dinner in the Diner (at the Chattanooga Choo Choo).  It was so much fun.  We hadn't been on a nice date since our honeymoon.  Normally that wouldn't be something that we could afford.  I got a $25 gift certificate offline at restaurant.com for like $2 or $3.  No restrictions apply (no, I didn't get paid to say that).  So that was some great savings.  I will post pictures as soon as I get the camera cord thing straightened out.  We also have certificates to the Station House (also at the Choo Choo) that we can't wait to use. 

Adam and I have been sticking to our running/walking routine.  It's actually more running than walking, which I'm excited about!  The evenings workout actually works out pretty well for me.  I get to get all my stress out, shower before bed, and then I can get ready in 20 minutes or less in the morning.  It's great.  We actually are going to go in the morning before church if we can get up!  I like it so much better than spin.  It works more with my schedule, and I enjoy getting outside.  Well Adam and I are getting ready for a lazy evening at home (minus the laundry).  Enjoy the rest of your weekend!

Peace out, 4:45 a.m.!!!

So Adam and I have been getting up every morning (Monday-Thursday) at 4:45 a.m.  Yes, we are crazy.  We have been going to spin class.  I have been doing spin since back in November (but in the afternoon, not at 4:45 a.m.).  It was very effective at first.  I lost a good amount of inches and was feeling really good about myself.  Then before the wedding I began going twice a day because I had become a little lax with my workouts, and I needed to get in shape fast.  But now I can't tell that spin is doing that much for me.  I think my body is used to it.  I don't get sore from it anymore.  It was fun when Adam started going with me though.  We have been going really early in the morning because we like getting our workout done before the day begins cause then we don't have to worry about it later.  But it has been absolutely killing us getting up that early.  Plus, it takes away from most of our evening because we have to get in the bed so early.  We literally get off work, eat supper, do laundry, dishes, etc and go to bed.  We can't do it anymore.  Plus, I need to switch up my routine.  Spin isn't working anymore.

So we're going to start working out in the evenings.  I think it will work better.  Yeah, I'll have to work out after work, but I'm going to choose to look at it as my "de-stressing time." : )  We're going to do some walking, running, biking, and hopefully we'll find something fun and new to do.  I think it will be good bonding time for us since we'll be able to talk.  You can't talk during spin.  The music is too loud, and there's a bunch of people around.  It will be nice to have this time together at the end of the day.  If you have any suggestions on good workouts, let me know!  We're always looking for something new to do.

We had a good weekend this weekend.  Friday night we went to Zaxby's and got dinner and a birthday cake milkshake!  Ohhhhh yeah.  I really like how I went from talking about working out to a birthday cake milkshake, hahaha.  But seriously.  It's amazing.  Perfect Friday night treat.  Saturday we PAID OFF A DEBT (my engagement ring)!!!  That's a PRAISE!!  We also cleaned up the house.  Saturday night we had our middle school youth over for a little get-together.  Adam and I teach the middle school youth on Sunday nights at our church.  We had so much fun having them over.  We picked up pizzas, played some badminton, Bananagrams and Signs.  Signs is the best game ever.  PSBC, you know what I'm talking about.

Well, it's getting late, and I need some rest to get the week started off right!  Please pray for me at school.  It takes a lot of energy and patience to teach my little prek kids!  Goodnight!

I can do it myself....correction- CAN'T.

I've been feeling pretty overwhelmed lately.  The first 2 days of school have come and gone.  They were a whirlwind for sure.  I feel like as a new teacher there are so many things I don't know about.  Attendance, student files, parent paperwork....not to mention prek.  It's a lot different from fourth and fifth grade!  Not only that, Adam and I are doing Crown Financial Money Map counseling.  Whew.  That is a lot of work and stress too.  Adam and I are also going to begin teaching the middle school youth at church tomorrow night.  Now, don't get me wrong.  I am really excited about everything we have going!  It's just...a lot.  I believe everything I'm doing right now is exactly what I should be doing, but it feels like a big load.  I just need to pray for God's help.  I often try so hard to do things on my own.  I usually feel like I have to prove to myself that I can do it.  I have been that way with a lot of things in my life.  I always regret it, but I want to do them because I think I can.  I'm SOOOO hard headed when it comes to doing things myself.  Silly, right?

This right before Adam left for Iraq.  Another stupid time when I told God, "I will handle this myself."  That was so dumb.  Yes, I made it through, but I missed out on an amazing opportunity to grow closer to God!  I could have been leaning on God, submerged in His Word.  That was a period when I had a lot of time on my hands!  But what did I do instead?  I read the Twilight series.  Good books, dumb choice.

College.  Another great time to lean on God.  But I rarely did.  I wanted to make the A's by myself.  No thanks God, I can handle this one.  I wonder what things God could have done through me if I had been more open to Him.  Higher grades....scholarships....higher honors.....finding good Christian friends at school...who knows?  I wanted to do it myself, so I'll never know.

I don't want the rest of my life to be that way.  I need God.  I don't need to prove that I can do things myself.  Because I can't.  There isn't a single thing that I can do without God.  That is really difficult for me sometimes.  I like to think I'm fairly smart, organized, capable of handling many things at once....but God says I'm not.  He said I can't do anything!!!

"I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing." -John 15:5

I can't do anything!  I can't claim anything I have done.  God was helping me the whole time.  I could not get out of bed in the morning if it wasn't for God's grace.  I really need to focus on this reality.  Please pray for me, and I will pray for you- that we will surrender to God every morning and beg him to lead us and show us the way.  Beg him to stay with us, help us, and guide us.  I need to say, "God I can't do it on my own.  I need you."  I'm beginning a challenging time in my life- prek, youth leadership, marriage, financial stuff, etc....  But I want to do things differently this time.  I want to be used by God.  I know that if I would just let Him, He will take over my life and do incredible things with it!  So I've decided.  I'm surrendering.  But it's not a one time deal.  It's a daily, hourly, momently thing.  But I want my life to change.  I want to do things God's way.   

Ready and Willing!

My life has been CONSUMED with prek lately. When I'm not working on my classroom, I'm reading about teaching prek, and when I'm not doing that, I'm dreaming that I'm a failure at teaching prek. Our house is a mess because I've been so busy, and I can't remember the last time I cooked supper. I know it hasn't been this week at all. I feel guilty for letting things slide, but this prek room was one huge feat. It was literally a storage room. My garage is now FULL of prek things.

It is hard to believe the classroom still has so much in it, but it is looking awesome!  (I will post pics of it later.)  Sarah Burns and my mom have been a HUGE help.  They have both been over there several times during the week and stayed for hours.  I wouldn't have been able to get everything done without them.  I went over today and completed my hallway, door, and put in a little something extra from my mom. 
 
 

 
The quote says "We worry what a child will become tomorrow, yet we forget he is someone today."  I love that quote!  It's so true. 
 
 

 
The door....(get it HOPPING into Prek....cause I'm a HARE......get it???  Hahaha.)  Anyway.  On the side is the back end of a hare hopping into the classroom.  I thought it was a cute idea.  Sarah said it was pretty cheesy, but hey, it's prek.  I'm allowed to be cheesy :)  Ignore the fact that it says "Mrs. Knowles" next to my door.  That's the teacher that retired. My name isn't up yet. The orange things are carrots with the kids' names on them :)
 
 

 
The hare statue is from my mom.  I have decided to call it "Taddle Bunny."  Whenever the kids feel like taddling on one another, I will tell them to go tell it to the Taddle Bunny.  I have a feeling if they stand there long enough and taddle to a statue, they will begin to feel pretty silly.  No more taddling for them :)
 
I'm really excited about teaching prek.  It's amazing how God has worked everything out for me to have this job.  I always told myself that if God ever placed me in prek, it would be to test my patience.  Pre-k takes SOO much patience.  I always thought I would teach 5th grade, but the Lord placed me here.  I know I will be tested to my limits and my patience will be pushed, but the Lord put me here to grow me.  James 1:2-4 says, "Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything."  This verse (which, Devan, I did have to look it up to see where it was, so I will be memorizing this one.) is what I will focus on.  Don't get me wrong!!!  I'm VERY excited about teaching prek.  But I know that it is the more challenging road for me.  I like quiet work, desks, experiments, discussions, etc. which is so not prek.  But I am willing and eager to grow and learn.  The peace I have is that God put me in this job and He will see me through.  So in the meantime, I am preparing like crazy!  This will be a new adventure, and I am not going to miss the opportunity for God to use me (Thank you Devan!)  I know he can use me within the school, the county, with the parents, and hopefully as a light to the children.  I am going to be ready and willing for the challenge!

Blogger Newbie

I've been following a few blogs for a while now.  I never thought my life was interesting enough to have a blog, but I love reading about other people's lives.  It wasn't until Devan Draper began a blog that I thought I might actually start one!  She invited me begin one, so now I have an excuse.  I love the idea of encouraging one another in our relationships with God, our husbands or boyfriends, friends, work, school, etc.

So when I first really thought about beginning a blog, I knew I would need to talk to Adam about it first.  Now, I don't plan to share our deepest, darkest issues and feelings, but I do plan to talk about our relationship.  So he has to be ok with it.  Plus, I don't hide things from my husband.  I'm a newlywed, but I do know hiding things is a no no :)  The thing is, I already knew how Adam felt about blogs.  He doesn't understand why people would want to get on the internet, voice their opinions, talk about their feelings, when no one has asked to hear any of it.  I was dreading talking to him about it, cause I knew I would feel stupid.  So when he came home for lunch one day, I reluctantly decided to ask him about it.  He came in and asked me what I was doing. 
"Reading Devan's blog," I replied.
"Oh really?  I didn't know she blogged," he replied.
"Yeah, it's about her struggles and daily life stuff, and then she can get advice from other people.  I'm thinking about starting one if that's alright with you."
"What for?" he said.  (He wasn't being mean, just asking.)
That's when I burst into tears.  "I just thought it would be neat to get advice from other people and to lift each other up and to be there for each other.  It's like a ladies' group or something."  (I said all of this in between sobs.)
"Ok honey, ok why are you crying?  That sounds like it would be good."

I don't know why I got so emotional...because I was embarrassed probably.  I knew he would think I was silly for wanting to write on the internet.  But I really just wanted to be a part of something positive where I can seek advice from Christian women.  It is SOOO hard being a newlywed.  I know it's supposed to be blissful, and it is, but it is also hard work.  I thought I knew it would be hard, but sometimes it's really hard.  But it is never TOO hard.  Nothing is TOO hard with God. 

So now that I have told Adam, and he is supporting me (hardest part done!), now I begin blogging.  If you know me at all, you know I'm pretty OCD.  I'm a teacher.  Let's face it.  I'm OCD.  So as soon as I signed up for my blog (which only took forever trying to find a good URL), I began looking at templates.  Oh dear.  I could look at those all day.  I wanted the perfect template.  I'm so lame; I'm aware.  So I found one; it's pretty cute.  Then I hard to start writing.  I realized I began looking for spelling errors, gramatical errors, etc.  I'm OCD.  So...to truly blog you have to forget about all that.  It has to be "readable" yes, but it also has to be your honest, true thoughts.  Not doctored up.  So I'm working on that!  I don't want to be OCD on my blog.  Please give me the freedom to not be OCD on here.  I'm a teacher, but don't judge my errors!  Thank you :)

I'm not a very transparent person.  Adam says I am, but he's my husband.  He can always look at me and know how I'm feeling.  But to the world, I don't tell much, don't have many opinions, and try to stand in the back.  I want to be perfect to the world.  That's why I'm not sure how good at blogging I will be.  I don't like to be transparent.  I don't like for others to know that I struggle, am not perfect, and am not the best Christian.  I don't want people to know that. 

But then I started thinking....I don't want to be that way.  I want people to know what that I share their struggles, I get angry, I "try" to find time to spend with God (we all have time, we just don't think we do).  I want people to know that a real Christian is not "holier than thou" and does not know everything.  I wish I knew half of the stuff people I go to church with know.  But I don't.  I want the world to know I am unperfect, because then I can show them that I have to daily rely upon God.  My marriage is NOT perfect.  In our selfishness, we would love to appear perfect.  But then we would not be the representation that God intended us to be.  To love inspite of our inperfections.  To be submissive even when the other is not what we think they should be.  We are to love because that's what we were called to do.  Not because the other deserves it.  We don't deserve anything.  I know this post is getting lengthy, and I'm sorry.  I just want you to know that I am starting this blog because I want to grow.  I want to learn from other Christian women, learn to rely upon God for EVERYTHING, and I want to be able to look back on my posts, good and bad, and see how much I have learned and grown in Christ and through my relationships with others.